


After Afterparties

by Livelovelupin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Eventual Get Together, M/M, Modern Hogwarts, Pining wolfstar, and disney movies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:47:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22366639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Livelovelupin/pseuds/Livelovelupin
Summary: "Remus shouldn’t have introduced Sirius Black to Disney movies; he quoted them so much it made Remus want to gouge his eyes out, or kiss the smile right off Sirius’ face. It was a struggle, really."
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 10
Kudos: 188





	After Afterparties

“Life is not a spectator sport, moons!” Sirius hiccuped, smile so big and bright. Remus could already feel his resolve shattering. 

Remus shouldn’t have introduced Sirius Black to Disney movies; he quoted them so much it made Remus want to gouge his eyes out, or kiss the smile right off Sirius’ face. It was a struggle, really.

Remus also should learn how to say ‘no’ to things, e.g “No, I don’t think you could copy of my homework, thanks! Would you like me to help?” or “I don’t think I want any part of this, Sirius, I’m going to bed. You have fun though, alright?”

But he didn’t. Which was why he sat in the Gryffindor common room by the fire, while a victory party was alive all around him; Gryffindor had won the most recent Quidditch game against Ravenclaw, which was “something that deserves celebration, lads!” to quote James Potter. Remus was glad that the Gryffindor team won, he was. (He didn’t think he could handle a full week of whining from both James and Sirius like the last time they lost, going on and on about how “We deserved to win, moony!” or “Can you believe it, Remus? Can you? We lost to freaking Slytherin!” Remus could believe it, yes. Remus could also feel his brain swelling in his skull the entire week. He would rather that not happen again, thanks!)

Remus was glad, but he would’ve preferred being in his bed at midnight, reading a book, or thinking about Sirius in totally appropriate ways, or doing homework, or thinking about Sirius in totally inapprop–

Well, it was the principle of it, really. Remus wasn’t a party or alcohol kind of person, but, alas, there he was, because Sirius Black asked him to come, and fuck Sirius Black for being so convincing and cunning and manipulative and pretty and–

The point was made clear. Remus couldn’t say no to Sirius, and it irritated him to no end. That irritation evaporated, however, as soon as Sirius sat next to him and quoted The Hunchback of freaking Notre Dame.

Remus would’ve scolded himself for thinking that, and he probably should have as well, but he couldn’t, not with Sirius looking like that; smiling so big and bright and beautiful, and his eyes had a glint of mischief in them that filled Remus with dread, and a fuzzy feeling in his stomach that made him roll his eyes. Sirius’ hair was at the length that putting it in a bun was almost possible, but not quite, so when Sirius did put it up in a bun, most of it was too short and therefore didn’t stay in place, and instead, the strands were loose, framing Sirius’ face, and it shouldn’t look good, but it did, it looked so, so good.

Yeah, how could he say no to that? All of that?

Sirius put his half-full cup of whatever alcoholic beverage James managed to get on the table in front of him, and it didn’t make sense, because Remus knew. He knew that Sirius never drank at any of these parties, and Remus felt pathetic for paying Sirius enough attention to know that, but it was strange. Sirius would have a full cup in his hand, then set it somewhere, then he’d take another cup, then set it somewhere else; he’d never actually drink any. He would, however, by the end of the night, act absolutely hammered, as he did now, with askew walking and the occasional hiccup.

Remus never commented. He usually just played along, assuming that Sirius had a reason for being play-drunk. It did break his heart a little, teeny tiny bit, but he never commented all the same.

Remus couldn’t help smiling in Sirius’ direction, because it was Sirius, and because he wanted to. The Disney-quotes-at-every-fucking-turn phase probably had something to do with it, but Sirius looked strangely cute, which is not a word used to describe Sirius often, but Sirius looked cute and Remus let himself enjoy that, just this once, without feeling guilty for having feelings like the ones he had for his friend.

“Life is not a–”

“Yes, I heard you the first time, Pads.” Remus’ voice was steady and calm and collected, like he wished his insides would be. But they weren’t, not with Sirius this close.

“You did? Then what are you still sitting on your ass for, Rem? Get up!” Sirius tugged on Remus’ shirt sleeve and Remus’ head was going to explode, but it didn’t, thankfully, or not.

Remus quickly pulled his hand out of Sirius’ grasp, which made Sirius huff in what Remus assumed was annoyance, before shaking his head and settling beside Remus, resting his head on the couch and closing his eyes. Remus could see the shadow cast by the fire his eyelashes caused underneath his eyes, and he looked away, because he knew how not to stare, even when every single cell in his body wanted him to, and he knew how to act casual when Sirius’ knee was touching his, or when Sirius was so close he could smell him, as if he was surrounded. Remus knew how to keep secrets, how to hide and disguise emotions. Sometimes he wished he didn’t; sometimes he wished that he could not hide his feeling and that they were painfully obvious because then Sirius would know, and maybe maybe…

But Sirius did not know. He didn’t have a clue, which was the worst thing ever, or the best, depending on how brave Remus was feeling.

“I wanna watch another one, Remus. Can we? Please?”

“Don’t you have a party to be the center of, Sirius?” Remus looked at Sirius, raising an eyebrow slightly. Sirius shook his head, before leaning close to Remus to whisper something in his ear. Remus held his breath. He couldn’t breathe.

“I am not actually drunk, Rem,” Sirius whispered, as if telling Remus a secret of great importance. He leaned back, with a grin on his face. “Let’s watch another one, please?”

“I know you aren’t,” Remus said, and wanted to go back in time and cut his tongue the second he realized what he had just said. Sirius smirked slightly, and he got up without a word and headed towards the stairs, to their dorm room, Remus assumed.

Sirius was referring to the television Lily and Remus had spent the good part of five months working on to make functional at Hogwarts. Blood, sweat, and tears later, the television worked, and Lily brought a bunch of movie DVDs from home. Sirius had been going through the animated movie DVDs one by one(he liked those particularly), and he made Remus watch the movies with him, so he could ‘ask questions’ if he needed to.

Sirius loved the movies so much, and whenever he and Remus watched one, Sirius’ eyes would be slightly too wide and he would be so focused. He cried at almost every single movie they had watched (Tangled, the fake death scene. The Lion King, the very real death scene. Lilo and Stitch, too many scenes to count. The last one they’ve watched had been The Hunchback of Notre Dame, which included Sirius's eyes glossing over when Quasimodo was at the festival of fools. Remus found the whole thing so very endearing, and, well, cute. But no one needed to know that.)

Remus stayed where he was for a few moments, breathing steadily, or trying to. He shook his head a little bit, and that reminded him of how Sirius did that every single time he transformed back into human form, so dog-like that Remus suspected Sirius didn’t realize he was doing it post-transformation. Remus frowned a little, so now he was picking up Sirius’s habits as well? No way. And if anything, the continuous movement made his head hurt, so he stopped, and he made a conscious decision never to do that again.

Scoffing at no one in particular, Remus got up and headed towards the stairs as well.

_Fucking Sirius Black and the way he fucking got everything he wanted._

When Remus entered the dorm room, Sirius was sitting cross-legged in front of the blank television screen on the floor, with the pillows from all the marauders’ beds and quite a few blankets around him.

(the television was on the floor because they had no other place to put it. And because they shared it with Lily. They agreed on a one-week-for-us-one-week-for-you thing). He had two DVDs in his hands, and he was looking at them intently before Remus cleared his throat.

Sirius looked up and smiled. “Which one do you think we should watch, Remus?”

Sirius shoved the two movies in Remus’ face as he was sitting down next to him. The movies were _Ratatouille_ and _Home._

Remus bit his lip. “They’re really good. Both? But _Ratatouille_ first.”

Sirius nodded and handed Remus the film, because no matter how many times Remus had done it in front of him, and the fact that it was just pressing a button and putting the disc in place, Sirius couldn’t get the hang of it.

“Why don’t you do it, Pads?” Remus asked as he was inserting the movie, smirking.

“Shut your trap, Moony.” a pillow was thrown in Remes’ direction, and he laughed, and so did Sirius. Remus sat down next to Sirius and was making himself comfortable.

“What’s it about?”

“A rat who likes to cook, and then he ends up in this famous restaurant in Paris and, well, watch and find out.”

Sirius blinked at Remus a couple of times. “You’re not joking, are you? How could someone come up with an idea like that, do you think? How creative and imaginative and brilliant they must be in order to–”

“Do you want to keep talking, or do you wanna watch the movie, Sirius, because, honestly–” Remus was cut off with a pillow thrown at his face, again.

“Just start the damn movie, Rem… Hey, how offended would you think Wormtail would be if I started calling him Ratatouille? How about for Christmas, we get him a stuffed animal of the rat or something?”

“Merlin, Sirius,” Remus shook his head, smiling. “And the rat’s name isn’t Ratatouille…”

“Then what’s–”

“The movie is starting, Padfoot,” Remus interrupted Sirius because had he not done exactly that, Sirius would have continued on and on and on, which, if Remus was being truthful, he wouldn’t have minded one bit; but, he still wanted Sirius to watch the movie because he thought he would love it.

Sirius was about to scoff, or maybe shoot a sarcastic remark Remus’ way, but he didn’t, because the movie started, and, well, Sirius went into autopilot mode, except for an amusing comment and remark every now and then.

Example:

“How cool is this tastes-interpreted-as-sounds-and-colors scene, Remus?”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, they got electrocuted!”

“He got left behind! That’s unfair, Rem.”

“I want Colette’s motorbike, Remus. I will get one, you’ll see.”

“His son?!”

“His last name is Ego? HAHAHAHAHAHA. Okay, I’ve figured it out; James is Ego and Peter is Emile, case closed.”

“Oh no, not Colette!”

“She came back!”

“They showed him the rats? Why would they do that? That’s just dumb…”

“The review! Oh, this is going to be bad, isn’t it? No, no, no , no…”

After that, Sirius was quiet. He watched the movie until the last line of the credits left the screen, because of course Sirius Black sat through the credits of these movies. When the screen turned pitch black, he turned to face Remus, with a huge, lopsided grin.

“That was my favorite one yet!” Sirius all but shouted. Remus grimaced a little, but this is what he liked the most about the whole thing; seeing Sirius so happy made Remus happy, and he could admit that to himself. Sirius’ happiness made him happy, his sadness sad. He knew Sirius like he knew himself, and he liked him more than he liked himself. He saw Sirius angry and chaotic and miserable and verging on cruel, but he also saw him being empathetic and sympathetic and thoughtful and generous and kind. Remus knew about the gorgeous and the hideous, he knew Sirius like no one else, and it was okay to admit that, to himself at least; Remus liked Sirius.

Remus loved Sirius.

How could Sirius ever love, or even like, him back?

Remus shook his head to clear his thought, before rolling his eyes at the gesture he promised himself he’d stop doing.

“You say that after every film we watch, Sirius.”

“But this one is the one! So good, Remus. So, so good.”

Remus was going to tell Sirius that he had heard him say that sentence about three other movies he could list from the top of his head, when he didn’t, because Sirius’ hand was suddenly running through Remus’ hair, very, very softly. Remus felt (for the second time this evening) the air being knocked out his lungs. He felt someone squeezing his lungs with both hands so they wouldn’t expand to take in the air. He felt like he was deep underwater, or outer space, with no oxygen, no air, maybe even a missing a lung, or both.

Sirius tugged on Remus’ hair, so faint that Remus could have missed it. Remus was looking right at Sirius, and they were so close; they’ve never been this close before, Remus realized. Sirius smiled. “You’re hand should have shot up in the air, Moony.”

“You didn’t think that would work, did you?”Remus’ voice was far too shakey, far too faint. He closed his eyes and took a breath.

“No,” Sirius whispered, and it was too quiet, too intimate for Remus. Sirius's hand trailed from Remus’ hair to the back of his neck, with his thumbs ghosting above Remus’ cheekbones. “You knew I wasn’t drunk…”

Remus hummed almost absentmindedly. “I did.”

“I never drink,” Sirius confessed. “My mother sees no better way to spend her days and nights. It reminds me of her, in a way, so I try to avoid it, mostly.”

Remus’ hand fisted around Sirius’ shirt, to feel grounded. Rooted. To ground Sirius, maybe. “I’m so sorry, Padfoot,” Remus said, and he opened his eyes, and was met instantly with gorgeous grey, almost silver ones.

“Don’t be, Remus,” Sirius shook his head. “Ask me if this is a dream.”

“Huh?” Remus must have looked confused because Sirius chuckled.

“Just do it, Rem.”

“I, eh, is this a dream?”

“ ‘Its the best kind of dream, one we can share,’” Sirius said, smiling bright. “Now you go, ‘But why here? Why now?’”

Remus was no less confused, but he did oblige. “ ‘But why here? Why now?’” and he really couldn’t help himself, but he snorted, which made Sirius snort, and shake his head (again) (maybe it wasn’t just an after-transforming-from-dog-to-human thing; maybe it was a Sirius thing).

“'Why not here? Why not now? What better place to dream, than in Pari–’, well no, than in our dorm room that’s way too stuffy right now, and smells weird most of the time?”

Remus laughed, and Sirius laughed, then that laughter died down, with Sirius’ thumb moving over Remus’ cheekbone (still), and Remus still holding the front of Sirius’ shirt like his life depended on it (still).

“That was from the movie, when Remi was–”

“Yes, from the television, well, from the fake television inside the real, eh, one. Yeah,” Sirius trailed off.

“What other quotes have you already memorized, Black?”

Sirius cleared his throat, smiling slightly now, “ ‘You must be imaginative, strong-hearted. You must try things that may not work, but you must not let anyone define your limits because of where you come from; your only limit is your soul. What I say is–’” And Remus couldn’t take it anymore, any of it, the closeness and the tension and hand in the hair and the fucking Disney quotes; Remus was kissing Sirius, and Sirius was kissing Remus. It was soft and sweet and gentle, but also… more. Nothing like Remus imagined because no way in one thousand and one years could he have ever come close to imagining anything like _this._

When they broke apart, they were still so close. Remus’ eyes were closed because he didn’t know what to look at. His hands were around Sirius’ neck(when did that happen?) and he didn’t know what to do with them. Sirius’ hands migrated down to his waist (when?). The thoughts running through his head were so tangled and jumbled they would never make sense, and for the first time in a while, Remus didn’t try to decipher them. Remus felt tranquil, calm, languid, and still in the best ways possible.

Remus smiled, and he decided to open his eyes because that was the bravest Remus had felt in a while, so he might as well. He looked at Sirius, who looked like fucking spring. Remus smiled wider, if possible.

Sirius stayed silent for a while, before biting his lip and starting to sing. “ ‘You’ll be in my heart, yes, you’ll–’”

“What—What’s wrong with you?!”

“It felt like a good moment! And now you ruined it. Thank you, Remus. Really, because–” Remus kissed him again, because he needed to shut Sirius up, and because he was so happy he felt like he was floating through a field of strawberries on a hot summer day, or that he was home.

Remus felt Sirius smile against his lips, and that was exactly the feeling.

**Author's Note:**

> *heart eyes*


End file.
